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Finck, Henry Theophilus, 1854-1926

"Primitive Love and Love-Stories"

"
"It is true that the young man commonly seeks to gain
the favor of the girl he likes before he applies to her
parents, in which case, if his suit is accepted, the
supreme favor is at once granted him by the girl; but
inasmuch as he does not need her good will necessarily,
the parental consent being sufficient to secure
possession of her, he shows little zeal, and his peace
of mind is not in the least disturbed by a possible
refusal. Altogether, he is much less solicitous about
gaining her predilection than about getting her for the
lowest possible price."
Alberti was evidently a thinker as well as a careful observer. His
lucid remarks gives us a deep insight into primitive conditions when
love had hardly yet begun to germinate. What a worldwide difference
between this languid Kaffir wooer, hardly caring whether he gets this
girl or another, and the modern lover who thinks life not worth
living, unless he can gain the love of his chosen one. In all the
literature on the subject, I have been able to find only one case of
stubborn preference among Kaffirs. Neuhaus knew a young man who
refused for two years to marry the girl chosen for him by his father,
and finally succeeded in having his way with another girl whom he
preferred. As a matter of course, strong aversion is more frequently
manifested than decided preference, especially in the case of girls
who are compelled to marry old men.


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