"
If this were true it was indeed a priceless, overwhelming gift, and he
was terrified at himself as he found how his whole nature was responding.
He also knew that it was not in his frank, impetuous spirit to disguise
deep feeling. Should Miss Hargrove control his heart, he feared that all
would eventually know it, as they had speedily discovered his other
little affairs. And little, indeed, they now seemed to him, relating to
girls as immature as himself. Some had since married, others were
engaged, "and none ever lost their appetites," he concluded, with a grim
smile.
But he could not thus dismiss the past so far as Amy was concerned, the
orphan girl in his own home to whom he had promised fealty. What would be
his feeling toward another man who had promised so much and had proved
fickle? What would the inmates of his own home say? What would even his
gentle mother, of whom he had made a confidante, think of him? Would not
a look of pain, or, even worse, of scorn, come into Amy's eyes? He did
love her dearly; he respected her still more as the embodiment of truth
and delicacy. From Miss Hargrove's manner he knew that Amy had never
gossiped about him, as he felt sure nine-tenths of his acquaintances
would have done. He also believed that she was taking him at his word,
like the rest of the family, and that she was looking forward to the
future that he had once so ardently desired. The past had taught him that
she was not one to fall tumultuously in love, but rather that she would
let a quiet and steady flame kindle in her heart, to last through life.
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