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Various

"Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 152, February 7, 1917"

My foremost thought would always be
The comfort of the lady helping me.
We have a cask of beer that's solely for
Your use--we are teetotal for the War.
I am a cook of more than moderate skill;
I'll gladly cook whatever dish you will--
Soups, entrees.
_Super-Char_. Now you're talkin'! That's some sense!
So kindly let me 'ave your reference,
And if I finds it satisfact'ry, Mum,
Why, s'elp me, I 'ave arf a mind to come.
_Third Lady_. My last good lady left six months ago
Because she said I'd singed the _souffle_ so;
She gave me no address to write to--
_Super-Char_. What!
You've got no reference?
_Third Lady_. Alas, I've not!
_Super-Char_. Of course I could not dream of taking you
Without one, so there's nothing more to do.
These women--'ow they spoil one's temper! Pah!
Hi! (_she hails a passing taxi_) Drive me to the nearest cinema.
[_She steps into the taxi and is whirled off.


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